Hello I’ve been struggling with intrusive thoughts most my life but for almsot 2 years when I started to go back to church it’s been about God and Jesus and all of that. Thsi year had even the absolute worst. Know I don’t even know how to believe in God or find any meaning or hope or anything in the word and God and Jesus. None of it absolutely nothing about Christianity feels real and I’m terrified my hearts to hard. I’m scared I’ll never believe and I don’t know how nothing makes any sort of sense I find verses that feels like God talking to me but I don’t let it change me because of my thoughts and all that I’m so scared I don’t know what to do