I definitely have been through that spiral of wondering whether or not I actually understand the scriptures when I read them, I know when I start to get into that mindset it’s because I either didn’t start praying before I opened up my Bible or prayed and started doubting. I’m telling you, the times I prayed beforehand (and not like a long drawn out prayer either.) I mean just simply asking “lord, speak to me please, in the name of Jesus” right after he would speak to me and reveal things to me through his word, and I mean simple things that I never saw before! Another thing, sometimes I notice personally when I ask Him, and I get my answer, immediately the fears start coming in. I can TOTALLY relate, please don’t feel alone about any of this! Reminder: 1 peter 5:8-9 “Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion seeking whom he may devour. Resist him, steadfast in the faith, knowing that the same sufferings are experienced by your brotherhood in the world.” To continue that thought about fear- when I start feeling fearful about the things I know I ought to say or do but don’t have the strength to do them and find myself in rough spot (and this can be over anything) the Holy Spirit nudges me to ask for the strength to overcome my flesh getting in the way with what the spirit in me really wants to do! He doesn’t expect us to ask perfectly he just wants us to ask in faith without doubting! Keep praying please! Pray for strength, pray that Jesus gives your mother eyes to see and ears to hear, never let fear, distractions, doubts, or worries stop you from praying. And if they do, get back up again and say “Jesus help me please I cannot do this!” I know I’ve been extremely guilty of finding myself getting anxious and discouraged when the answers are truly simple. Hey I hope this helps I really do, we are here for you!

You are being called to be set apart while things like studying are important nothing is more important than Your Relationship with Christ and as for your Mim sweetheart she isn’t the one that will stand in front of God on judgment day that will be you. I know it’s hard but it’s because you are trying to do it in your own will Many of us can help you to interpret scripture and I can help to interpret scripture please reach out anytime

Some times you need to surrender and take a breath.

Confía en El Señor. Pídele sabiduría. Ora en silencio si temes que te escuchen. El Señor te va a dar valor. No dejes de hablar con Dios. Si lo crees todo será posible porque para Dios nada es imposible. Bendiciones