Hey, I just felt like the Holy spirit wanted me to respond to your post. I want you to know that regardless of what people and doctors say, depression is not something you just get, its long term sadness that grows because you let it dwell in your heart, and it is curable, and you don't even need pills, or anything like that. I used to have depression, and I know how it feels, but from someone who got out of that, I'll tell you what worked for me. At some point of going through depression I realized I was wasting away my life,and I decided I didn't want to do that, and that if I didn't want the life I had I would dedicate it to Jesus. Honesty the thing that brought me out was 2 things, and that's, for 1, focusing more on Jesus than my circumstances, and 2, deciding to be optimistic. At first, it is harder to be happier, because you have to put in more work, but it's so worth it I can't even begin to explain. I learned that if you focus on everything going on that's good, instead of all the bad stuff, you will be so much happier. If you ever need anymore advice or just a friend, let me know and I'll be here