Jesus died for us meaning he opened the gates of heaven meaning that we now have the chance too go to heaven but on judgment we could be going to hell if we don’t belive in Christ but rather follow the world .and that’ it is a hard life as a believer and that you have to strive to the narrow gate and that you have to give your best and all that idk what to do anymore I feel angry ignored i mean god hasn’t talk in decades maybe and every Christian tells me to wake up to repent and I am freaking tired and then a person tells me I am doing a works based salvation what the actual heck iam I supposed to do when everybody tells me ,,do this ,,do this,, this is what your doing wrong,, ,,this is why you haven’t heard from god,, ,,your a lukewarm,, and idk what do I can’t find rest like this is so annoying to me I don’t understand it anymore like what the heck what balance balance where how I am I supposed to find balance I am between to sides either way I am not pleasing god so what I am I actually doing I am always doing something wrong always first it’s I am giving my all to show my love for god wathcing videos that could maybe explain signs ,, this is why your not walking forward with god,, then going to church,m only listening to worship music ,, only wathcing Christian shows doing the most loving my neighbour ,,being faithful ,, and still hearing nothing from god is driving me crazy making be believe I am talking to myself ,, and then I get burned out because people tell me to put in the effort to deny my flesh ,repent,be reborn, all those things and I try to catch then all and I try and read the Bible wanting to know more having a deep desire for god trying to keep it all together because it says iff yiu love me keep my commends ,, but I am trying not to break them walking of freaking egg shells and what happens iff i sin and never actually repented there so many diffrent opinions on what repentance is try finding an in a sack full of them I am tired and no I don’t have a online community idk how fellow ship works I don’t have anybody not a pastor a preacher